When You Can't Fix the Tics, Fix Yourself
Hello everyone!
In this video, you can see some of the great changes acupuncture has made to Stink’s vocals.
More on this from Martina to come this week.
Keeping it short – my hubby is out on biz, my kids still have homework, and I am dead. Tired.
Talk soon!
Andrea
Hi guys –
Some of you have commented or written to me that you want the same formulas Martina, Stink’s acupuncturist, is using on Stink.
The reason I’m not giving them out is because these particular formulas are based on Stink’s individual make-up:
* The color of his tongue (his is bright red which goes back to his liver)
* His pulse – different kids have different circulation issues based on their individual make-up
* His “wind” – whether he has hot or cold energy
* His particular issues – for him, lingering head shakes. The vocals are GONE
I am NOT PUSHING you to call Martina for a consultation, but I CAN tell you that she will help guide you toward someone who can help your son or daughter get their particular needs met.
Full Disclosure: Despite all of Martina’s amazing acupuncture, my son has mild to moderate head shakes still.
“Some of this has to do with the fact that Stink isn’t up to speed with his full set of formulas yet,” Martina informed me. “He had those loose stools, so we had to wait for his body to adjust to the supplements more slowly.”
She went on to add, “Remember, acupuncture is not like Western Medicine. It’s not a ‘drive thru cure’ where you take a pill and symptoms are masked. It’s a slow and steady build up towards optimum health. You must commit to the process or you’ll be disappointed.”
“Well, okay. But I want a silver bullet!!!!!” I screamed on the inside. (or maybe to her. I won’t say.) My gut is going with Martina on this though. We’re going to have to trust the process.
Questions for Martina re: how she can help your child with his/her specific issues?
What are they? Leave a message and I will have her answer them within 3 days, via the comment section or a post.
My last post about my tic resolutions (what I can change, what I can’t, and having wisdom to know the difference) generated quite a bit of buzz over at The New Jersey Center for Tourette Syndrome where my blog is syndicated. While many people 100% got my point of view, I got a couple pretty negative comments. I had a few reactions:
1. Wow, cool! I’m finally pissing people off! People are reading!
2. Ouch, ick. That stung. Poor me. Let me go cry to my friends on my “Twitch and Bitch” forum.
3. Logical schmodgical: What if I really am offensive?
#3 stuck to me for a variety of reasons. Let’s start a new list, shall we?
1. I’m not writing this blog just for me. I’m writing it for others. It’s my duty, as an “educator” to be sure I am communicating effectively.
2. There’s a fine line between being a narcissist and writing compelling, memoir-driven articles.
3. Most interesting realization of all: Insecure people, even among friends and family, will often skewer people they know as being narcissistic because of their preconceived views of who that person is and should be within the framework of their very own insecure lives. People have a much easier time extolling the virtues of “other” writers – you know, the ones with the pretty book jackets who end up on “The View” or “Huffington Post” – who already have stamps of approval by the public at large.
4. Referring to #3, once my book goes, said haters and cynics will suddenly tout me as being right all along. Yeah me!
5. As a Christian, I would be nothing more than a hypocrite to push any of this in their face, or respond to negativity with like. I must love them as Christ loves me, and if I can’t, enter Christ. For those in the #3 camp, this #5 statement makes me not only a narcissist but a self-righteous one at that.
6. This leaves me with #6: “If God is for me, who could be against me?’ Romans 8:31
I don’t just tout #6 as a fun inspirational flag-waving-attempting-to-accept-tics-and-not-ruffle-feathers-mama. I feel it. I care about people, but if people don’t like me, I don’t really care. It’s lovely living in this place! Come join me if you haven’t bought property yet. The neighbors are friendly, there’s lots of laughter and the wine is fabulous! (Being good on the wine, relax.)
I did write to Jeff Weber, New Jersey’s fearless web master, to be sure I wasn’t being offensive. He gave me the pass, so off I go to do what I do!
Acupuncture Update: In closing, Stink’s vocals are still gone. He was complaining of loose stools from the supplements he was on, so we backed it in half. Unfortunately, his head shakes came back full force. That’s the bad news.
The good news is that Martina, his acupuncturist, believes he just needs to adjust to it slowly and the tics will go back down.
Martina Does Acupuncture Phone Consultations: Want a consultation on how to find an acupuncturist for your child in your area? Martina is available for phone consultations. She won’t recommend specific businesses, but she’ll get a sense of your child’s symptoms and then tell you what to look for in the right person, giving you specific acupuncture terms to use in narrowing down the right professional for your child’s needs.
Martina’s Consultant Fees: She charges $40/half hour, $60/hour. She’s versed in nutrition and supplements and can lead you in the right direction. Look soon for a new video of her treating Stink!
Martina’s In-Person Fees: Martina is in the L.A. area. Consult her directly for prices. Rates go down if you buy a packaged deal which, honestly, is recommended as she will want to start treatment 3 days/week and reduce as symptoms wane.
Martina’s Contact Info: You can find info on her at the link above. For quick reference, call her at 818-378-4157. You can also look up her website or email her at Martina@YPIH@Gmail.com
Tell her Andrea from Happily Ticked Off referred you. I get absolutely no referal fee for this, but it does help her adjust her prices to you. (Pssst. I’m takign care of you!)
Check out more posts about Tourettes at the New Jersey Center for Tourette Syndrome where this blog is syndicated.
* Picture is “Woman in a Purple Coat” by Matisse. It always inspires me to live a life of purpose, joy and love. She just looks so relaxed, yet confident. I’ll take some of that, and a back scratch. Thanks!
Keeping this short as I’m at work. (Unless you’re my boss reading, in which case I am diligently coming up with 75 Examiner Headlines.)
How was your holiday season? How are the tics? How are you dealing with them?
One dear friend of mine from my private group keeps a Victory journal. It’s a faith-based writing memoir in which she shares her struggles and hopes for her son with God. By writing down verses and scriptures, she has an automatic go-to way to release some of her fears. I love that!
As for me, I am a pray-er and list maker. Here are my goals for dealing with Tourettes this year. Would love to hear yours.
Fantasy Goal
Not let tics bug me in the least!
Realistic Goal
Find the courage to accept the tics I cannot change, change the tics I can, and have the wisdom to know the difference.
Vocal Tics Gone
Thanks to acupuncture, Stink’s vocal tics are gone. I mean GONE. Given how much crap he ate over Christmas, combined with video games and lack of sleep, I don’t believe this is just coincidence or part of the tic cycle. Acupuncture is the reason, so I’m grateful. (Stay tuned this week as I video tape the lovely Martina speaking on this subject!)
Still Shaky Shaky
Unfortunately, my son’s head shakes/nods are at an all time high. I mean, NON stop. (How they don’t bug him is amazing. I honestly get so drained being around it sometimes. I swear, it’s ME who needs some kind of hyno-therapy for this. Still, not depressed like I was years back. Just working on acceptance. There is hope!)
Martina thinks that the supplements will kick in after six weeks and to be patient until then. If the constant shakes don’t go away, it’s time to reconsider how much time he spends on the computer.
NOTE: I pray that he does find relief via the herbs she is prescribing, because he SOOOO loves his gaming. He is not playing all day. He plays weekends only. During vacation he plays 1 – 2 hours/day. This might seem like a lot, but as a kid, I watched TV 1 hour-2 hours/day. I also biked and ran and hung out with friends, just like Stink. We’ll have to see.
Realistic Plan for 2014 for Tic Treatment
* Gluten free unless a birthday party in which he gets pizza and cake. (Similar to me and wine. It’s all moderation.)
* Computers weekends only except 10 minutes/during week to feed some virtual plant in some game. (I know, it’s dumb)
* New sport introduced for daily exercise
* Dog for him to walk daily! (Stay tuned! He got a promise for a dog on New Year’s Day which was also his 11th birthday! Tics increase in the tween years, so I’m keeping this in mind.)
* Acupuncture 3 days/week + supplements
More Hardcore Plan if tics don’t decrease by Spring
* No 10 minute virtual plant feeding during week
* Going dairy free again
* Revisit the idea of Brain Balance now that I’m working and might be able to swing the 5K
* Consider some kind of Lens Treatment for tics
* Revisit an environmental doc to guide me on pros and cons of letting a kid be a kid (video games) and supplementing with good stuff I’m already doing
For Me
* Daily exercise
* No wine during the week
* Church on Sundays with family
* Bible Study daily (just ten minutes)
* Life Group (small groups of people thru church) to connect with once/week and remind me that my life is not based on tics but something so much greater than myself
I pray that 2014 brings you peace that transcends understanding. I pray that you (and I) remember that all kids have something. We can’t always fix the tics, but we can encourage the gifts our kids are born with. Personality trumps Tourette Syndrome. Love you all!
Check out more posts about Tourettes at the New Jersey Center for Tourette Syndrome where this blog is syndicated.
Those of you with tics who have written to me often say that your noises bug you.
Those of you without T.S. but who live with it say the sounds can drive you batty.
I have nothing but sympathy for people with T.S. when their symptoms drive them nuts. Honestly, if my friend’s kid is ticking, doesn’t bug me in the slightest! But when it’s my kid, I really struggle.
Perhaps this is like people who have sympathy for the anxiety/neurotic/blabbermouth type. You might find me those other emotionally-inclined people funny, but if you lived with them, you might want to kick them to the closest pharmacy and insist they down a bottle of Xanax with a Zoloft chaser.
For those of you who have issues with vocals – despite feeling guilty for having such issues – I am pleased to announce you might actually have a mental disorder!
This just in from someone in my Twitch and Bitch private group: I had to share with my loyal mamas here!
You’re welcome.
Misophonia:
Misophonia, literally “hatred of sound”, is a neurological disorder in which negative experiences (anger, flight, hatred, and disgust) are triggered by specific sounds. The sounds can be loud or soft. The term was coined by American neuroscientists Pawel Jastreboff and Margaret Jastreboff and is often used interchangeably with the term selective sound sensitivity. Misophonia has not been classified as a discrete disorder in DSM-5 or ICD-10, but in 2013 three psychiatrists at the Academic Medical Center in Amsterdam formulated diagnostic criteria for it based on the largest cohort of misophonia patients so far, and suggested that it be classified as a separate psychiatric disorder.
The disorder comprises a unique set of symptoms, most likely attributable to neurological causes unrelated to hearing-system dysfunction. It can be described as an immediate and extremely negative emotional response accompanied by an automatic physiological flight response to identifiable auditory, visual, and olfactory stimuli. The disorder disrupts daily living and can have a significant impact on social interactions. A 2013 review of the most current neurological studies and fMRI studies of the brain as it relates to the disorder postulates that abnormal or dysfunctional assessment of neural signals occurs in the anterior cingulate cortex and insular cortex. These cortices are also implicated in Tourette Syndrome, and are the hub for processing anger, pain, and sensory information. Other researchers concur that the dysfunction is in central nervous system structures. It has been speculated that the anatomical location may be more central than that involved in hyperacusis.
Symptoms:
People who have misophonia are most commonly angered, and even enraged, by common ambient sounds, such as other people clipping their nails, brushing teeth, eating crushed ice, eating, slurping, drinking, breathing, sniffing, talking, sneezing, yawning, walking, chewing gum, laughing, snoring, typing on a keyboard, whistling or coughing; saying certain consonants; or repetitive sounds. Some are also affected by visual stimuli, such as repetitive foot or body movements, fidgeting, or movement they observe out of the corners of their eyes; this has been termed misokinesia, meaning hatred of movement. Intense anxiety and avoidant behavior may develop, which can lead to decreased socialization. Some people feel the compulsion to mimic what they hear or see. Mimicry is an automatic, non-conscious, and social phenomenon. It has a palliative aspect, making the sufferer feel better. The act of mimicry can elicit compassion and empathy, which ameliorates and lessens hostility, competition, and opposition. There is also a biological basis for how mimicry reduces the suffering from a trigger.
Prevalence and co-morbidity:
The prevalence of misophonia is unknown, but groups of people identifying with the condition suggest it is more common than previously recognized. Among patients with tinnitus, which is prevalent in 4–5% of the general population, some surveys report prevalence as high as 60%,[11] while prevalence in a 2010 study was measured at 10%.
The Dutch study published in 2013 of a sample of 42 patients with misophonia found a low incidence of psychiatric disorders, with the exception of Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder (52.4%). It has been suggested that there is a connection between misophonia and synesthesia, a neurological condition in which stimulation of one sensory or cognitive pathway leads to automatic, involuntary experiences in a second sensory or cognitive pathway. The basic problem may be a pathological distortion of connections between various limbic structures and the auditory cortex, causing sound-emotion synesthesia. There are people with both misophonia and synesthesia, and many people with synesthesia have more than one form of synesthesia (there are over 60 reported types). Misophonia may very well be another type of synesthesia.
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They are now doing studies to see if there is a relationship between ADD and Selective Sound Sensitivity Syndrome (4S). Individuals with ADD are typically not bothered by loudness of noise – rather, the softer, repetitive, common sounds are the ones that irritate, distract, anger and sometimes send them into fight or flight mode.
Good news! This post is not as long as Sunday’s “War And Peace” expo Stink is seeing relief already from one treatment of acupuncture yesterday. I am so relieved. He came home calmer, with a 75% reduction in vocals. He still sported major eye rolling and head shakes/head butts, but his acupuncturist says it’ll take a week or so to really get suckers subdued.
I’m lucky as my son’s healer (and the source of my new found hope) is the incredibly talented Martina Eberhard who just happens to live across the street from me. She practices out of a darling 3 bedroom, wood floored, 1950’s cottage home. Her treatment room smells like heaven. It’s about about as clean and professional as any first-rate office park salon. In fact, it’s easier to relax in as the whole house is flooded with a personal warmth. Parking structure and cement? No thanks. I’ll take curbside service and a brick patio.
A few years back, she had come up with a treatment plan and supplements that she was convinced would really give Stink 90% relief. (Video and post here.)We ended up not seeing her plan to fruition because, despite only 20% of her treatment being executed, we saw such drastic improvement. Stink was tired of doing it, also, so we took a break.
Um, the above statement? It’s kind of akin to a bipolar person going off their meds because they “feel so much better!” Suddenly there are freak outs, manic screaming, and all around “What just happened?” despair. Pretty stupid, but let’s not berate ourselves with the past, shall we? Moving on.
As fate would have it, just when I started to lose my brain with tics, Martina mentioned that she saw this article on a teen Miss America who had severe T.S. and was “cured” through acupuncture. The formulas and treatment used on her were the same as Martina recommended for Stink two years ago, inspiring her even more to work on Stink again!
So, with my heart in my hands, tears in my eyes, I said “Yes.”
Full Disclosure: Martina’s rates are more than reasonable for her high level of skills. Check out the above video – she is sticking needles into my kids head and shins! She knows what she’s doing. That said, because of my professional writing background, we are trading service for service. I only mention this because if trades were not an option, I’d pay anyway. She’s that much of a healer. Eberhard did not pay for this review.
Big Take Away: Where there’s a will there’s a way, and sometimes we must get creative to make things happen. We all have gifts – why not use them to benefit one another?
Stink will begin acupuncture three days a week, then taper to two, then one.
Last night we had an impromptu bbq in the back yard. My sweet hubby cooked for us all, including Miss L and Martina. Connection and friendship out trump tics every time.
I’ll keep you posted! Meanwhile, is something working for you?
Check out more posts about Tourettes at the New Jersey Center for Tourette Syndrome where this blog is syndicated.
Everyone in my Twitch and Bitch group is kind of freaking out about tics, including me. Not sure if it’s Christmas or the weather or just stress from school, but they are in high gear.
As a background, most of us have kids between the ages of 8 and 12 – the majority being boys.
Most of us moms are trying super hard to “accept” this condition and all that goes with it – the ADD or the OCD, the “spectrum” like symptoms ranging from obsessions over video games to underlying defiance.
Lest any of you are new to the T.S. scene, let me reassure you that NONE of the kids in my private group are seeing shrinks for outrageous behavior that is often associated with Tourettes in the media. In fact, the more parents of neuro-typical kids I chat with the more I see that talking back, wilfulness, and general lazy butt behavior is developmental for all kids. The best thing I’ve discovered is to not freak out about any “issues” being T.S. related, but simply treat them the way I would treat my own daughter’s turd like the-world-revolves around me attitude at times. This entails a “It’s my home/my rules” full frontal attack.
I don’t feel bad about it.
I don’t give Tourettes a free “Get out of Jail card” for bad manners, selfishness and poor attitude.
For the most part, I’m realizing that tics are here to stay and the best thing I can do as a parent of my beautiful son is to encourage his gifts, not obsess about his “flaws” that – let’s get real – are not really flaws. It’s his body. Just as someone of a kid in a wheel chair likely feels pangs of sadness each Christmas when the child’s friends go ice-skating and Mama must find alternative sources of entertainment, I mostly embrace the truth that Stink is not someone else. He is Stink.
The mom of the wheelchair girl is not going to scream at her “Why can’t you walk?” any more than I’m allowed to scream “Why can’t you STOP rolling your eyes back and forth?” (Oh, man, the eye rolls this week – OUT OF CONTROL.)
That said, and here’s the real rub… there’s a difference between a mom accepting that her child has certain disabilities and special needs (Ugggg… the words “special needs” also drives me crazy as don’t we all have special needs?) and allowing the kid to falter due to poor choices that both the parent, and the child, make.
Example re: the wheelchair kid: So they can’t go ice-skating, but it doesn’t mean they get to sit all day long in front of a computer, gain twenty pounds, and not do physical therapy for upper body strength. It doesn’t mean Mom might not keep an ear out for alternative ways to get that kid walking if the “cure” is being developed.
Example for my kid: Accepting mild tics as the norm for this condition is different from accepting mid to high-range tics based on poor choices that include:
* Loads of extra gluten because there’s always a holiday party, a birthday party, a play date where “everyone else gets to eat pizza and cupcakes it’s sooooo not fair”
* A school event where someone brings in corn bread and Kool Aid as if to intentionally make get my kid to leg kick like a Rockette just to really. pxxsss. me. off. (Do putting “xx’s” in a bad word make me classy or perhaps even more redneck crude because I am covering up my poor language with stupid letters? But I digress…)
* Extra computer time where he sits in front of a fast-moving screen and overloads his frontal lobes with Dopamine, causing a huge spike in vocals and head nods.
* Not enough exercise and sleep.
* Not enough veggies.
* Not enough good supplements or acupuncture or maybe, yes, maybe trying something else that can calm down these movements and high energy. I’m open!
One of my Twitch and Bitch members posted this encouraging article about break through technology in treating tics and Tourettes.
I of course got excited when I read of a possible break through treatment because, I have to be honest, my kid’s energy and tics this December have hit new highs.
After a good six months of being on the same page with my husband on everything (he’s really been AMAZING since I’ve been back at work) we skipped church today. Instead of worshipping together and enjoying our family at the park afterwards where we laughed and ran and counted our blessings, we hung out in the bathroom for fifteen minutes counting the tics. It was a lovely photo opp: Him sitting on the counter, me on the tub which, oh my, needs to be scrubbed in the worst way.
We went round and round… and round and round… about my worries about Stink’s tics and computer addiction love and my husband’s complete out of touch with my son’s real needs confidence that Stink will be fine despite some movements and sounds he can’t control.
On one hand, I’m thrilled someone is not as obsessed and vulnerable about T.S. in my home. I am extremely lucky that I get a break from all my obessions over tics domestic responsibility while my handsome hubby handles it like a pro – calm, relaxed and with an amazing attitude. My mate has impressively taken over all drop-off and pick up, play date coordination, food shopping, laundry and teacher meetings so all I need to do is go to work and write. It’s brilliant.
But this morning, after the kids lost their computer privileges for arguing and me, at my limits with one too many discussions revolving video games, I’d had it. Rex and I had a very heated discussion which ended with us deciding to drop the issue for the time being.
So we did.
But it didn’t keep me from dropping him the email below. Because, well, I just care. Too much. I care about my son to the point where I won’t stop fighting for some relief until I have no fight left. And yes, while tics and lack of focus bug me a hell of lot more than they bug Stink, as a mama, I just know when something isn’t right. And we have to do something to calm things down so my kid’s brain can be more balanced. I just know we do.
Hi babe –
While I hate to argue about old stuff, I’m at least glad we talked and left our discussion with a plan. It’s more than we have had in the past.
…And all through the house
My Stinker was squeaking
A bit like a mouse
It wasn’t too, bad but it did make me pause
That I’d sure like a gift from dear old Santa Clause
One for myself cause’ I’m selfish that way
But one also for you to arrive Christmas Day
Just a wee little something for us all to calm down
When Tourettes takes our smiles and turns them to frowns
See, you folk are emailing me all over the place
That your kids’ tics are growing at quite a fast pace
You’re all freaking out – “Could it be sugar or Grinches
That’s causing the coughs and the crazy nose pinches?”
And while some of it’s diet and perhaps lack of sleep
The truth is that none of this might cause the squeaks
It could just be that tics go up and go down
And who knows the darn reason those darn things hang around!
So Dear Santa, it’s Andrea… help me to feel fine
For my son feels content – help me, too, fall in line!
Bring me a present that might not mean healing
But instead comes with grace and with thanks and good feeling
For my boy – he’s so big now – oh, my, how he’s grown
Give it ten years and I’ll be here alone
I don’t want to be thinking, “I missed this great season…
…I was freaked out and stressed. I blame tics for the reason!”
No, let me remember that all kids have stuff
It’s our love and our compassion that must be enough
So to moms out there struggling, with all of my might
Take my virtual hugs – it’ll all be alright!
I LOVE YOU ALL!
Love, Andrea
In closing, here is a video from my sweet little Stinker and his biggest fan, Pip.
Check out more posts about Tourettes at the New Jersey Center for Tourette Syndrome where this blog is syndicated.
Sunday after church we took the kids ice skating. For those of you who live in beautiful wintry wonderlands, picture a frozen pond surrounded by snow capped trees and cardinals.
For those living in the city, like us, picture a mall with busy traffic on one side and a parking lot on the other. Picture kids in shorts and parents in tank tops. It wasn’t Norman Rockwell holidays In Dreamland, but we had a blast.
With Stink’s tics in high gear these days (lots of head shakes forward and back, side to side and strained speaking that sounds a bit screechy) I was only too happy to get on the ice and go round and round – getting that pent up “Ooooh, I wish it would stop” energy out.
Lord knows my head had been going in circles as well. “Oh, no, does he need to be put on medication finally? Should we not have taken him off the focus pills? Is it too much gluten? Do we need to go back to the supplements again? Acupuncture? Me going back to work?”
While all of these concerns are valid, I can’t let them define my life or his. The reason? His tics don’t bug him. They only bug me. Which, again, and I fully admit this, makes me a narcissist.
It’s why I’m bringing this up now – and I really want your opinion, as it relates to my book. (Yup, more about me. Narcissist!)
My book is not really about fixing tics. It’s about a journey that I went through, and still go through, dealing with a disorder I can’t cure. It chronicles a not so amazing experience at Stink’s school, as well as my marriage, over the course of one year.
Less Narcissistic: I didn’t write the book to have it be the Andrea show. I swear! I wrote it because, despite what I went through, our family transformed. I found my faith. I found peace despite less than peaceful circumstances. I want other moms who feel alone to know there is light at the end of the tunnel.
But the book itself – it goes there. To that place of raw and uncomfortable and wow does it ever get better?
I intersperse the book with my inner voice – one who sings show tunes. And does two-steps. And has been known to wear a sparkled fedora.
One person read it and told me that, at parts, he could barely read further. My “creative” tangents were unnecessary. No one cares about this inner voice. It’s too “out there.” It was “sarcastic” and “potty mouthed” and just not what “people who want answers” want to read.
It stung. But then I realized that with all due respect, he is not my target audience. YOU ladies are. And, well, I didn’t write a book to give anyone answers to tics – because I don’t have them. I only have the experience of the journey.
My book – like this blog – was written as a love letter to you moms – to let you know that yes, it SUCKS sometimes. (Woops, potty mouth.) But I made it. And I’m stronger because of it. It is NOT MEANT to be a manual to save everyone from the pain of Tourette Syndrome. (Though I wish it could be.) It is meant to be a manual for a hopeful life regardless of unexpected circumstances.
Tell me – do I ever come off too crude or too “in your face” when it comes to finding humor in a not funny situation?
Why do you read here?
Would you read a book about a mom’s journey from dark into light?
Do my ramblings here make you laugh or am I just exhausting?
Do I come off terribly un-elegant?
I am realizing that the process of writing a book is not unlike birthing a 12 pound child. I might need some serious drugs to get through this.
Until then, please know, as unelegant as I may be, I am here for you. You are going to be okay. I support you. You are NOT alone.
Check out more posts about Tourettes at the New Jersey Center for Tourette Syndrome where this blog is syndicated.
Are you thankful for tics this Thanksgiving season? You’re not? When my son was first diagnosed, I wasn’t either. But today, from a place of experience and growth, I am happy for the character building that has come from this crazy ride.
“How is that possible?” You might ask, before reaching through the computer and throttling me with frayed nerves shot from hearing thirty minutes of throat clears on the way to morning drop off. “I’m terrified my kid is going to be made fun of. Or worse, that this condition will be harder for him than it is for me!”
I get it. I really do. And all I can offer is my own experience, which is this: Six years later, my son is totally fine. Yes, he still tics (last night his vocals were driving me a bit nutty… low gulps and clucks) but he completely embraces with who he is – not a kid with Tourettes, but a kid who creates video games, loves his sister, rocks math class, has a gaggle of geeky computer boys at our house every Friday night and, oh yeah, he tics. It’s a microcosm of who he is in the grand picture.
Yes, people ask him about his tics sometimes. And he always gives them the same answer: “Jesus made me this way.”
I never saw myself as a religious person, but from the vantage point of time, I realize just how much my faith has meant to me and how much it’s shaped my son’s worldview of himself.
I really came to believe that our God is the same yesterday, today and in the future. “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.” Hebrews 13:8.
If this is true, then God does not make mistakes. Which means my son’s T.S. was not an error in the production line of human creation. “For You formed my inward parts; You wove me in my mother’s womb. I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well.…” Psalm 139:13
Oh, yes, does Stink know it.
Which leads me once again back to me. How do I know God’s plan for my life? And how does this relate to Tourette Syndrome?
I know not because someone thumped me on the head with a Bible or dragged me to church. I know not because someone drowned me in holy water and made me accept the Lord to live.
I know from hitting rock bottom in my marriage and my parenting. It was only when I took a chance that maybe, just maybe, there was something outside of my own spinning brain that was guiding my steps, that I started to heal.
It took a while, but God was patient. Turns out I didn’t have to understand it all at once. I only had to have a little bit of faith.
“If you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move; and nothing will be impossible to you.” Matthew 17:20
Ironically, that passage comes from a section in the Bible where Jesus heals a boy with a demon. I have often wondered if perhaps this child did not have “evil spirits” in him but just a bad case of tics that people didn’t understand. I wish I could have been there to hug that boy’s mother and father and let them know that, “Hey, you are not alone. I get it.” (But hey, they got the Big Guy himself. They didn’t need me!)
But it’s you likely do. I definitely do. We all need each other to support and encourage us along this journey. “For where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst.” Matthew 18:20
As I begin my new job as the female voice for Believe.com, I am looking forward to sharing my faith as it relates to marriage, parenting and Tourettes. I hope you’ll visit me over there so we can all grow together. (Link to my column when it’s live in a few weeks. Meanwhile, I’m open to a lot of suggestions. I’m looking to make the content more personal, edgy and conversational, like my BabyCenter and Good Housekeeping days, except instead of talking sex and diapers we’ll be talking tics, marriage and Jesus. And who am I kidding – you know I’ll slip in some sex talk anyway. I have just discovered this Christian blogger, and wow, is she good.)
Note: Believe.com is a Christian website, but for those of you who are not Christian, you are welcome also! I’d love to learn more about your background. And of course, I’ll always write here at Happily Ticked Off – because you readers are my first love.
Until next time, hug that ticker of yours today.
Check out more posts about Tourettes at the New Jersey Center for Tourette Syndrome where this blog is syndicated.
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