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My Friend’s Kid is THAT Kid. ADHD

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Keeping this short. After a long day of cramming in freelance jobs, full time work searching, getting the kids off to school earlier than normal, an “OH MY GOSH I NEED A BATHING SUIT FOR THE YOUTH GROUP POOL PARTY” fiasco and then, of course, rushing over the party only to come home for two minutes to rush back, I wonder if I, perhaps, have ADHD.

Alas, just the ever persistent contact-switching mama brain.

Before the sun sets on another day in paradise, I wanted you to see an article written by a friend’s son, Jackson. It appeared in Additude Magazine and I thought it was so well written for a young kid.

With ADHD licking at our ears, it’s a good reminder to not judge but instead help our kids learn to advocate. I don’t know about your kids, but for us, Stink’s ADD is more of a challenge then the tics themselves.

Side note (because when am I ever on track?): Had a GREAT phone conversation with Dr. Nicole Beurkens. Situated in Michigan, this psychologist started out as a special needs teacher, then moved into the consulting side of special needs to more deeply support kids and parents. What began as a summer program for special needs kids in her basement, morphed into a 10,000 square foot practice where she treats all sorts of neurological disorders holistically.

With a team of nutritionists, psychologists and natural practitioners, she supports the whole child (and his/her family) to balance out their brain without medication. Here’s just a tiny snippet from her website. In depth article to come as well as a book review!

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nicole

If Meds are For You – No Judgement!

Again there’s no one-size-fits-all and I look forward to hearing from all of you.

Let’s Hear Your Success Stories!

Who has had success with drug options? Who has had success with medication? Who just has an awesome kid who is the best thing that has ever happened to them? (Me me me!)

I love and support you all. We are in this together.

Until next time,

May God grant you the serenity to accept the tics you cannot change, the courage to change the tics you can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

My book is available on Amazon. Follow me on Twitter@AndreaFrazerWrites or on FB

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I’m Always Sorry

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Tonight, after listening to non-stop vocals all day – we’re talking 30 times a minute – I decided to never, ever I MEAN NEVER look up “tic cure” “tic video” “tic help” or “tourettes is driving me crazy” ever ever again.

Why? Because it’s been 8 years of this. Oh sure, I have moments where I am okay (when things are quiet) but then the tics rear their ugly heads and I’m back into despair again.

No more. Do I want them to subside? Yes. Of course. With every tic, twitch and shudder I’m remembering that on Tuesday I will be in a naturopath’s office – a place where we’ll hopefully get some answers to this insane spike in symptoms.

But as someone very wise told me over the phone just now, this is not my journey. It’s Stink’s. And really, if I’m going to be someone who has peace of mind and purpose, I simply have to let go of what i cannot control.

Seconds into this post, my son walked in.

Stink: “Mom, do you know where the game Sorry is?”

Me: “It’s in the treasure chest.”

Stink: “Oh, well, will you play with me and Addie? (his friend) I know it’s late but, well, it will be really fun.”

Me: (on the inside): “No no no no no don’t make me sit there and listen to the machine gun firing of noises I can’t make stop and can’t ask you to make stop.” (on the outside) “I would like nothing more. Let’s do it.”

Stink: “Really?”

Me: “Of course! But one thing first.”

Him: (suspicious) “What?”

Me: “We need snacks. Delicious ones!”

Him: “Yessssss!”

And so we played Sorry. All five of us. Me, Stink, Addie, Brooklyn the Pit Bull and the tics. And I’m not one bit sorry about having that time with my sweet boy.

Until Tuesday’s appointment with Dr. Magic, I’m going to really try to stop my mad obsessing. Because seriously, there’s some pretty messed up crud in the world. (Can I get an “amen?”) I had better come to terms with a bitch of a diagnosis I can’t control, because that skill set is going to come in handy if I’m going to have a big, hairy, juicy life.

Ladies, like you, I have a lot on my plate. I have a huge job interview on Monday. I can either say “no” out of fear. I can decide to give up the opportunity to stay home and watch my kid’s disorder progress with the tenacity of an OCD time bomb, ready to explode.

Or I can say “Yes” to life. To a change. To the hope that in letting go I’ll find peace.

With peace, I will have freedom.

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When we can find peace despite less than peaceful circumstances, we’ve found the cure. Maybe not the cure to T.S.. But the cure to fear.

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For those on this journey with me, let’s pray for each other. Let’s pray that we don’t take crosses upon ourselves that are not ours to bear. In the end, as my friend reminded me this evening, our kids are not really ours. They are on a journey to fulfill their destiny and we are on ours.

 

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I’m not sure about you, but as for me, I’m ready to say goodbye to co-dependence on an ever changing disorder.

Tics are up and and down. But my God is the same. And I’m pretty sure he has something glorious planned for me. I just need to say yes to my faith, not my fear.

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I pray you all do the same. And if you’re not there (hey, some days I’m not) please leave a comment. Share with one another. Our burdens are so much lighter when we don’t face life alone. And here’s the real kicker: We can put our burdens down, whether or not we’ve “fixed” our kids.

Yes, we can. We can drop them.

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And how much do you want to bet that when we get out of our own way the peace will come? Life is so cheeky that way.

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Until next time, May God grant you the serenity to accept the tics you cannot change, change the tics you can, and have the wisdom to know the difference.