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Tarzan Has Swung In: My Patience Has Swung Out

The warble is official. I had hoped against hope he was a squatter. But it turns out this tic has signed a year long lease and is not going to switch apartments any time soon.

Even his acupuncture with the lovely Martina today could not evict him.

On a good note, Stink rarely eye rolls anymore, thanks to his needle sessions.

On a bad note, it’s not curing his vocals.

Either it’s because we need to go back to two times a week.

Or it’s the Wii.

Or it’s just plain because he has T.S..

I won’t lie. I’m fried today. But on the other hand, I’m really trying to see the good in all this. It’s mild. It could be worse. I find myself clinging to faith and seeing this as a test. God has plans for me. He has plans for you. So my kid tics sometimes. So your kid tics sometimes. Guess what, they are amazing people, and so are you.

That’s all I have tonight.

Except for this: When you’re having sex with your husband, right before crucial moments, if he doesn’t want to stop, it can be really fun to have him quote lyrics to really bad 80’s songs. Because really, after a long day of ticking and obessing about if your kid is going to Tarzan his way into a college scholarship, do you really feel like having sex?

If not, but you decide it’s good for the marriage and you remember something about Christian scripture about submitting to your husband – even though mine is an Atheist nerd who I truly feel would be happier humping his hand made light up L.E.D. sculpture – shouldn’t you have a good laugh?

My shining moment happened when I had him scream “Every body… have fun…TONIGHT! EVERYBODY WANG CHUNG TONIGHT!”

I really couldn’t help myself. You should try it.


About Andrea Frazer

Find me at! I'm a produced television, magazine, newspaper and national blog writer available for freelance writing in the areas of faith, parenting, lifestyle and healthcare. In addition to ghostwriting and content creation, I am proud to be publishing my first book. Called "Happily Ticked Off," it is a humorous mom-moir about raising a son with Tourette Syndrome. I can best be described as Erma Bombeck meets Nora Ephron. I live to connect with others through writing, authenticity and just a wee bit of sass.

2 responses »

  1. Omgg, I have got to turn off my email notification on this blog… you are just too irresistably funny!! It is late here in eastern standard time and I should be asleep, not madly checking your post after my smart phone alerts me that you have posted again! I have become obsessively attached to your blog like my aspergian son is to beyblades. Oh, and I am going to have to try the 80s quotes. Have to add a little humour to all of life’s activities.

  2. @Angela – Wait until you have your husband get “completed” to “It’s! A! Hard! Knock! Lifffffeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!” Dude, it really makes T.S. and Aspergers okay.


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