I am so mad at myself I don’t even want to start a new post.
Instead, I will simply cut and paste what I wrote to my support group this morning.
Either I am terribly human or just a selfish, awful mother. I’m hoping for the first.
You know, I write this blog for moms.
I write for TS New Jersey.
I think I’m doing fine.
Then Tarzan comes back. “Ah ah ah”
It’s light but an annoying warble. Don’t know if it’s from strep or
food cheats or Wii or what, but I’m pissed.
Tonight in the kitchen he warbles very softly.
So I very very softly warble to myself. “Ah ah ah.”
To which he perks up his head and says, “I don’t like when you make
fun of me.”
I have done this before. At least 5 times in five years. It’s not that I’m intentionally mocking him, I’m just so annoyed at that tic- so sad that my little kid’s voice is interrupted by this darn invader – I do it.
I try not to. Given he’s been ticking for so long and it’s only slipped out a little bit is not bad. But it’s enough.
I’m writing this out loud for accountability.
Here I have this amazingly confident kid who is not afraid of others but will have a complex about hs own fxxxin mother if I don’t
There’s nothing I can really ask for except to tell me to get my friggin’ act together.
And with that, this very human, fried out mama, bids you good night.
May the ah ah ahhhhhs be with you.