It was a long but productive day in the land of Parent Coffee’s, after school pizza and some new work prospects – with lots of Ebay, writing, kid pick up, drop off and cooking shoved in between.
After school, Stink and his buddy quickly got into video games (long anticipated with none Monday – Thursday). That’s when the phone rung. It was a girl. And it was bound to happen. I couldn’t be the reining thin in his heart forever.
Girl: Stink’s Mom?
Girl: It’s Evelyn. I was wondering if Stink was going to go to the community pizza and movie night and, well, I am, so I thought maybe he’d want to go… too?
No, he’s not allowed to go out with girls until he is 28 Do you want to ask him yourself?
Girl: Yes, I do.
I know you do I’m just being nice this isn’t happening Oh, okay.
(Me… running with cell into the TV room.)
Me: (covering phone) Stink… (igoring me) STINK. It’s Evelyn.
Him: (non-plussed.) Oh, okay. (grabs phone, listens. Huge, enlightening conversation follows.) Huh. Oh. Wow. No I have a friend here. Okay. Bye. (click)
Me: Um, Stink, did she ask you to go to that party?
Him: (back on his game) Um, yah.
Me: Do you think it might have taken her a lot of courage to call you?
Him: Um… why?
Me: Because SHE’S A GIRL and that’s not easy!
Him: Oh. (then) Um, Mom, you’re blocking my view.
Me: (standing in front of him) Listen, I am not trying to be controlling here, but do you like this person as a friend?
Him: (genuinely surprised by my question.) OF COURSE, MOM!
Me: Then perhaps you should call back and invite her here.
This is the part that shocks me the most.
Him: Good idea!
Grabs phone. Looks into space. Talks.
Him: Hi, It’s Stink. So, hey, I can’t go to the party but you can come here.
Okay, really, THIS is the part that shocks me the most.
Him: Oh, you have to go to that party? Well, how about we get together another time? Okay, bye!
And that was that.
I have two things to say about that.
- I am by no means pushing my kid to like a girl – especially when he’s not really there yet.
- I don’t think, even if my kid was into girls, he needs to like the first girl who likes him. But as a former young girl myself, it seems to make sense that if a female is going to be bold enough to call, he can at least learn how to be kind, respectful, and elevate a few degrees higher than caveman.
Actually, the third thing I have to say is that while I might not have lost my boy to another seventh grade girl – yet – I lost his heart to something else a long time ago. Sigh. Anyone out there relate?
Until next time, remember to accept the tics you can’t change, change the tics you can, and have the wisdom to know the difference.