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Learning We Can Change


It’s been a wild ride the past year or so. Just when I get closer to finishing my book, something happens like my mom breaks a hip. Or she gets breast cancer.

But then her hip heals! And she is cancer free! Hooray!

So there is now no excuse to not finally finish that book of mine.

But it’s Spring Break. And really, how much writing can one do when they are surrounded by two children, their three friends, and the neighborhood dog who insists on barking at their front door every day at five begging for treats and play time?

And then there is my husband.  The dude works – a lot. And while I don’t expect him to shower me with attention like our dating days of yore, it does seem that we live in two separate worlds at times and I’m not really sure how that happened.

You see, he used to be this guy.


And I used to be this girl.

this girl

And we had this guy

this baby

Then my hot boyfriend morphed into this guy

this guy

And I morphed into this girl


And while we used to pour our joy into each other

this joy

We started pouring it all into them

2013-03-03 15.24.01 HDR2013-02-19 20.50.20

And while I’m stoked that in some ways we have a wonderful happy together family

for us

I wish that we felt a little more at ease with each other


Instead of trying so hard


But like tonight’s Beauty and the Beast show, which I was so happy to do a profile piece on, I am once again inspired to never give up. Like Tourettes, it’s imperative to find the beauty beneath the beast. In all our relationships, we must turn our compasses toward the lyrics of the main song: “Bitter sweet and strange… finding we can change… learning we were wrong.”

I am not perfect. Nor is my husband.

This life… it’s not always the fairy tale we expected before we had kids or were married.

But I’m thinking that no one has it all. And like the many shows I see that seem so together, I must never forget the hard work that goes into it. The days and days of choreography and practice and sweat and tears for the final applause at the end.

What a gift it was to spend the entire evening with my beautiful daughter, who went from this girl

b & w sophie

To this one


She is kind and elegant and quick to laugh and forgive.

So must I be.

The takeaway: Don’t give up because of a bad day, because in the end, there promises to be a positive review after a wonderful performance.

Thinking of you all tonight.


About Andrea Frazer

Find me at! I'm a produced television, magazine, newspaper and national blog writer available for freelance writing in the areas of faith, parenting, lifestyle and healthcare. In addition to ghostwriting and content creation, I am proud to be publishing my first book. Called "Happily Ticked Off," it is a humorous mom-moir about raising a son with Tourette Syndrome. I can best be described as Erma Bombeck meets Nora Ephron. I live to connect with others through writing, authenticity and just a wee bit of sass.

3 responses »

  1. What a beautiful post! I like the photo essay aspect of it. Really nicely done, and you have such a great attitude about bad days and realizing things have changed!

  2. What a beautiful post! I love the photo essay part of it. And I love your attitude about how things change and how to deal with a bad day.

  3. I really enjoyed your post. My daughter has tics. Maybe you have read the online article called “Finding Triggers for Tics” by Sheila Rogers, MS, Director, Association for Comprehensive NeuroTherapy
    or her books including “Natural treatments for tics & tourette’s : a patient and family guide” (2008).


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