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What Makes You Feel FantasTIC?

me

Hey, you, Moms. What do you do for fun?

Yeah, that’s right. I’m asking you what you do that makes you feel alive and happy. Extra bonus points if you laugh and get to kiss Hugh Jackman in the process. 

I ask because, if you haven’t figured out by now, life is an awful lot like tics. There’s good days, bad days, and lots of uncertainty about what to do, how to handle it, whether you’re doing it right or wrong. It can be overwhelming – unless you do something about it. Or, at the very least, consider it. 

Me? I am fun person, but I don’t always have fun. And there’s a big difference. I mean, I can tell a joke like nobody’s business. I can dance like a chicken while making tacos. I often belt out bad country songs with my kids on the way to ballet and have been known to flash my husband, in broad day light, with only the SUV hood for protection. So far, I have not been seen by any neighbors. (Well, none that I know of. I’ll keep you abreast of the situation. Wouldn’t want to keep you hangin. Thanks for the support.)

Moving on.

Now that I’m no longer needed at my big fancy company freelancing from home, I’m finding I have a lot more time to figure out what I want to do for my next job. I still don’t know what that specific job is, but I know what it isn’t. I could wax philosophic about what is not an ideal employment opportunity for me, but let’s just go with, “I don’t want it to suck.” 

To help me fight the urge to sign up for another job that feels like taking a blunt stick up my arse while listening to my son beg for extra Mario Cart time while my dog whines at the squirrels like a rabid cat in heat, I need to work on having more fun. I figure that if I’m more fun, I’ll be less apt to take on a job that isn’t fun. More fun, less suckage. That seems like a good plan.

With the above formula firmly rooted in my mind, and on my desk on a sticky note, I’ll be less apt to spend my free time scanning FB for photos and status updates of other people that appear to having way more fun than me.

I’ll be less angry at the computer screen when I read of evil beheadings and war over territory that is killing innocent civilians that, based on the photos of massacres, don’t look like any fun at all.

While I want to list a whole lot of things to do for fun, let me start with the first thing that comes to mind, and that’s writing here. 

It’s FUN with a capital F. 

This begs the question, why is it fun? 

The answer:

I’m not doing it for pay.

I’m not doing to convince anyone of what to do, or not to do, for tics.

I’m not even doing to get guest posts, ads or job. 

I’m doing it because I so love connecting with all of you.

Relationship and community.

Talking and healing together.

It’s not a new job.

But ladies, it’s pure joy. 

Thanks for being here for me. Have I mentioned how much I’ve missed you? How I miss the feeling of being “me” when I’m writing for “you?”

What do you do for fun? 

 

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I Could Be Ticked Off, But I’m Too Bleepin’ Excited

kids start school

Greetings from Happily Ticked Off. Remember me? That once faithful blogger who helped you navigate through the highs and lows of tics? The person who gave you all sorts of encouragement when you felt worse than a nit in your kid’s hair after a session with the lice lady?

Side note: Do any of you non-L.A./New York readers have this service? A real, live nit-picker who will comb baby lice out of your kid’s hair one painstaking strand at a time? Yes, even with much of our world in dire poverty, I say without apologies that I blew $400 bucks a few years back to deal with what I can only refer to as the Lice Infestation of 2010. It’s chronicled in this article, “Of Lice and Men.”

SUMMER

Did you all have a good summer? I, personally, did not. Mine consisted of this:

* Commute 1 and a half hours each way for a writing gig that kept promising insurance but didn’t give it

* Schedule kids for play dates and camp dates around my husband’s work schedule – that schedule being his very own I.T. company start up which, of course, does not pay insurance, but we have a dream, people! Dental, schemntal, insurance. Who needs teeth! I’ll start on my smoothie regime, lose weight, save money on the gym, and buy health insurance!

* Ebay on the side to make $29/month to put toward elusive insurance, only to inevitably spend it by the end of the month because I can’t take cooking, cleaning and kid wrangling ONE.MORE.SECOND. so I give my hard earned income to El Pollo Loco, Taco Bell or some other fast food joint that is not full of gluten but inevitably causes me to worry that I’m going to make my kids die an early death from their GMO-laden, toxic, hormone pumped chicken/cows, not to mention increase tics because, you know, I’m going to cure this whole syndrome with food alone.

* Have a few people close to me be less close to me because I’ve been so busy working my patience resembles a burned out elecrical chord on a dried out Christmas tree and, well, apparently I’m not as much fun to be around when I’m on four hours of sleep, six cups of coffee, and enough Oreo cookies to make Santa vomit. 

After 8 weeks of this insanity routine, my kids started school.

Normally I cry.

This year, it was all I could do to numbly kiss them goodbye at the classroom door. On one hand, it saved me the agony of worrying about my sixth (yes, SIXTH) grade boy’s tics increasing. I was too tired to freak out. “He’s a strong kid,” I told myself, and I meant it. “If he’s fine, then stop.” Work, with all it’s zillion tasks and responsibilities, simply didn’t allow for excess rumination. It was fall down and die of fear, or keep moving. I chose the latter.

On the other hand, numbness and stone cold resolve was a real sign for me that in running such a rapid pace I was not only outrunning grief, I was outrunning joy.

When was the last time I sat with my kids and read a book?

When was the last time I had coffee with my mom at the mall?

When was the last time I sat in my room, organized my photos, and just laughed at some of my family and friends’ ridiculous hair-do’s, not to mention my own?

While I can’t say I didn’t do any of those things mentioned above, I wasn’t as present as I’d like to be.

But today, after almost 10 months of marathon training, I was given my walking papers at work. (Well, not 100% true. My job was reduced to 75% of its original description. Which means 75% less pay.)

Fear? Anxiety? A wee bit. But truthfully, not that much. I truly feel God has a plan for me. Despite a whole lot of uncertainty ahead, joy and hope is bubbling up to the surface.

I’ll get to be present.

Present on my site.

Present in my home.

Present in my community.

And people, that is SUCH a gift.

I’ve missed you.

Andrea

(Pic of Stink, Pip and Miss L, starting 6th and 5th)

Wait, there’s more!

Check out more posts about Tourettes at the New Jersey Center for Tourette Syndrome where this blog is syndicated.

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